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ABOUT RELATIONS

What does every relationship demand? I always used to wonder could one have a relationship where there is no commitment, no responsibilities, no expectations and above all total freedom. This sounds impossible and inconceivable. First let us understand what relationship is. The dictionary meaning of this word is -connection or association-----emotional/sexual association between two people. Is that it?is that all what relationship is. The answer is no. Relationship between two people, be it between father/mother-daughter/son, between brother-sister, between friends, between teacher-student, between employer-employee, between husband-wife or between lovers is based on trust and honesty. Every relationship mentioned above is very delicate and has to be nurtured with lot of love, care and compassion.
In every relationship one cannot take the other person for granted. Respect and faith in each other is an important factor. At the same time understanding one another is most important. But at the same time there has to be some space in every relationship. Our parents expect only one thing from us and that is -sincerity and hard work. They toil hard all their life to educate us and to help us reach a position of which they can be proud. In this relationship there is no commitment but yes there is responsibilities and expectations, which are totally selfless and godly. They take our responsibilities as long as we are not capable of taking our own responsibilities and they expect absolutely nothing from us in return but only our support and cooperation in making their dream come true.
The relationship between brother-sisters is very sweet. A child first becomes friends with his elder brother/sister. In this relationship you will find selfless love and caring for one another. The elder one will take the responsibility of the younger and will guard him and protect him from every danger. It is a very beautiful bonding. This relationship also has to be nurtured with love, trust and understanding. The role of your brother/sister in your life is very important and one must always be thankful about it. You never know in how many different ways your brother/sister help you but a person has to attribute some part of his success, fame, status etc to his brother/sister. Because they were always there for you and always made you feel important and helped you through in your difficult times by extending their full support. This relationship is very unique and helps shape a person's life and carrier.
About friendship what do I say? Friends are like diamond, costly and rare. Now the word costly has nothing to do with money. Friendship is costly because you cannot afford losing it and you have to work real hard to earn it. True friends are very hard to find and once you have it you have to be real careful not to lose it. Now this relationship is totally based on understanding and trust. Friendship is in a way the foundation of every relationship. One can easily confide in a friend and tell a friend all his secrets. It is said, "a man is known by the company he keeps". This saying is very true for if you are in a good company and amongst good friends you will surely succeed in life. Thus friendship is such a relationship wherein commitment plays a major role. And friends are there in your life forever without any expectations or responsibilities. A man is lucky if he has a good friend and luckier if he knows how to maintain and nourish this precious gift.
Relationship between teacher-student is based on respect, honesty, trust and understanding. There is a lot of commitment and responsibilities in this relationship. They say that your teacher or Guru is next to God and a Guru's position is higher than your parents. Relationship between employer-employees is also based on trust, honesty and respect for one another. To make this relationship work and to gain optimum progress in work an employer must treat the employees with respect and should be their friend rather than their boss. This relationship demands total commitment, expectations are high and regarding responsibilities, sky is the limit.
Relationship between husband-wife is the most intricate and complex relationship of all. It involves a lot of understanding, lot of maturity and commitment, lot of trust and honesty, lot of sensitivity and humor and last but not the least lot of love and passion. Here commitment is the key word. To keep this relationship working one has to give lot of sacrifices. Once you tie the knot you have entered into such a strong bonding that demands lot of caring and attention. A marriage works only if both the spouses are mature and mellow and understand each other completely. Marriage is not just physical binding but it is a binding of two souls who want to spend their entire life in the company of one another. Here there is lot of responsibilities and expectations and one has to work hard to fulfill every need that the relationship demands. It is said, " marriages are made in heaven " which is not really true according to me. Marriages are very much made on earth by us, by our choice and it is for us to make it work. So one cant really blame destiny or God for all the failures. It is you who must have erred somewhere and it is for you to rectify the mistake.
Relationship between lovers is totally carefree and it's like a fantasy. Here one sometimes starts off in a casual manner, not really serious, might be just fooling around and sometimes such relationship culminate into marriage and sometimes they don't. But what is sweet about this relationship is that you are in love and though it might not work out, then also it makes you feel good and wanted. To make such relationship work one should be patient and understanding and should make the right choice, for it is a big step that a person takes and a proper relationship makes your life worth living while a bad one ruins your life. So one cannot afford love being blind.
Thus we can see that all relationships demand commitment, responsibilities, expectations, understanding and love. It is for us to understand our responsibilities and understand what we should give before expecting anything in return. It is for us to understand the intricacies of each relationship and try to solve every problem with utmost care and caution so that there remains no scar and bitterness. Thus relationship works like Newton's 3rd law----To every action there is always an equal and opposite reaction. For every gesture of love and kindness one will get in return only love and kindness. Thus to make any relationship work all you have to do is know yourself, know your vices and learn to admit your mistakes and improve yourself. Do not find fault in your partner or the other person----always try to find out where the problem lies and wipe it out from the root. Learn to say sorry and accept your mistake. Learn to forgive and forget and I assure you, you will never face any problem in your life.

...... by    Vrinda  ( Abu Dhabi )
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